Friday, July 17, 2009

Free at last, free at last..........

*screams to the heavens and back* I'M FREEEEEEEEEE

Ok, I haven't been on here in awhile because I was dealing with an issue that I wasn't trying to escape the proper way. I let myself be pulled back and forth by my ex emotionally and it was really weighing in on my psyche for far to long. Man, love will really fuck you up but at some point you just gotta break free. She was honestly a lot in my little world because I allowed her to be, problem was I became less and less in hers and was to blind to see it. She is the mother of my unborn child (catharsis volume 1) and the main inspiration to another post (kindness is a weakness) but she, at one point, was also one of my best friends and favorite people to be around.

It's funny because people tend to come to me with relationship advise and apparently I give great advise but I couldn't give any to myself and when I did I didn't follow it. Everyone has a breaking point in a relationship and it's amazing what happens when you reach it. You start to really put things into perspective and you can finally follow your own advice. It's amazing to me that I can already look back and laugh at it all (it's only been a freaking week). But knowing that I know longer get upset about the stuff I've been put through by her tells me that I'm truly FREE from that emotional bind that wouldn't let me leave. We've been flipping the switch on and off for the last year and I've finally decided to just cut the power from the generator itself (bad analogy I know).

I'm FREE at last *does crip walk into stanky leg* Now hopefully I can get back into some damn blogging

4 comments:

thehoustongirl said...

woo hoo! welcome back! I was gonna send you a email to find out what happened ol

poitree said...

Yay! Congrats. I'm trying to follow you into the light...

Chudi said...

Ok, this is a bit weird for me but apparently you're supposed to be my 'long-lost' cousin (from Sierra Leone). My mum has been on my back since the start of this year to find you; it's a long story. Anyway I'm not very comfortable talking about this in 'public', so if you're interested in keeping in touch, my email add is chudigooding@yahoo.co.uk. If you're not interested, I totally understand why. At least I made the effort. Oh, and your blogs are really interesting. Keep 'em coming.

dalioness said...

wow city I had no idea...You know you could've come to dalioness for advice...I got all the relationship answers..lol...Being in a marriage for 11 years gives you wisdom...I'm glad you were able to walk away unscathed except for a broken heart which I'm sure is healing quite nicely...Give Ness a holla every now and then Aight!